Tandem Live Blogging - Seinfeld Season 6 The Gymanst

This blog post brought to you by Sean and JT straight from Dusseldorf! We watched an episode of Seinfeld (a great one) and made yokes. MST3k style. For more hilarious live blogs, check out JT's blog JTsGermanAdventure

JT 0:00: Is it just me, or is Jerry's voice more annoying during the stand-up bits?

Sean 0:45 - I'm nervous. Jerry and I made the same joke at the same time about George's stupidity, only he did it outloud and on national TV.

JT 1:00 - "if i could talk to the mothers and have sex with the daughters, I'd have something going." George is clearly an inspiration for Timberlake and Samberg.

Sean 2:00 - "there's always a price to pay for just a sexual dalliance" "Jerry, you should pay that price." I've paid that price.

Sean 2:40 - How many times do I think about putting my shirt back on when leaving the bathroom? so many.

JT - 3:00 a coworker of mine had a kidney stone. His wasn't as funny as Kramer's.

3:10 - "Knowing you is like going into the jungle -- I never know what I'll find next, and I'm real scared."

Sean 3:30 - Has Elaine ever had a boss with non-white hair? Have any of them?

Sean 4:00 - Kramer is the kind of person you know and tell them things like "this is why we don't have nice things" he's just rifling through these fancy paintings

JT 5:00 - One of the key improvements of later seasons was that George's girlfriends grew ludicrously hot.

JT 5:30 "Are you and your family close?" "Very close, almost painfully close" I almost never refer to my family that way.
Sean 6:10 - Gerorge see's the eclair in the trash and eats it. After being in Africa for 4 months, I would eat it too.
JT - Who could pass up a free eclair? It's on top of the magazine, so no problem.

JT 7:20 - "So... Ceauşescu. He must've been some dictator." I like to say this on dates that aren't going well.

JT 9:25 - It's sad how bottled water used to be a niche product, not an obsession in the usa. I hate bottled water.

Sean 10:00 - George, the eclair wasn't "hovering" in the garbage. It doesn't have a jetpack or anything.

JT 11:00 - I'm glad I'm no longer in the position to have to consider people's feelings.

Sean 11:00 - When has Jerry ever considered people's feelings?

Sean 12:10 - Why does Jerry continue to talk to women in his car? It never ever works out for him.

JT 12:50 - "The magical world of sensual delights that most men dare not dream of" - that's just marketing nonsense from Cosmo. The magazine, not Kramer.

JT 13:50 - The most outdated line in the entire series? "How long do I have to put in, now that..." "3 weeks". I say "an SMS"
Sean 13:50 - "2 (possibly non-consecutive) weekends"

Sean 13:40 - Look at that Diet Coke can. Those are the cans my grandma bought.
JT 13:45 - Your grandma drank Diet Coke?

Sean 14:10 - Laugh track. Classic.

JT 15:10 - Jerry's reactions to George/Biff flailing on the phone is money. "Strike two!"

Sean 15:40 - Do we ever see George coming out of the bathroom in later episodes/seasons buttoning up his shirt? I mean, come on. continuity!

Sean 16:00 - I'm glad we're not live blogging our spoken commentary. Just juvenile.
JT 16:05 - Sean means "I'm glad we're not live blogging JT's spoken commentary. Just juvenile."

JT 16:30 - The first time I saw this, i thought the riding outfit was to set up the lame joke, "I haven't been on Jenny in 3 days". Oh no.

Sean 17:15 - Jerry's wearing a suede jacket. Didn't he learn that lesson earlier?

JT 1730 - I, too, blame elephants for all the ills of society

JT 1900 - Is this before or after the jujyfruits? Either way, Elaine would much rather lose a job/boyfriend than engage in mild confrontation.

Sean 19:00 - George says maybe he'll go upstairs "just to use the bathroom". JT looks at me and says that is a money move. "It's worked several times for me," he says. "Just say you have to use the bathroom and next thing you know, you're makin' out and- BOOM you're in!"

Sean 20:40 - The whole reason we're watching this ep is for the classic demeanor george has when he walks out of the shitter with his shirt off. Delivery. Pure delivery.

JT 21:30 - The Mr. Pitt as Hitler bit is much funnier since it wouldn't be allowed in Germany.

JT 22:30 - 16 years ago! That's not recent.


*** Bonus commentary on the deleted scenes***
Sean - I see why these were deleted.

what's up in dunedin

been a long time bla bla bla.

don't worry, it is really for an over-abundance of things to talk about than a lack of shit going on. where to start? maybe the epic trip that Hart and Katie made to NZ? or the sweet job at the bar that i have? or maybe how the hostel i live and work at is getting so terrible that it isn't even worth free rent? or about how the NBA is kicking off and i'm again missing the fact that i could walk into FB tomorrow and have one of the tv's turned to the right channel for me? or maybe about how I'm missing a Dynamo Playoff Game For The First Time In Two Years? whoa. don't tell anyone that last one, i'll lose what Naranja cred i have left.

what else is going on? i've been to some amazing beaches here in Dunedin, and next week i'm trying to make it a little farther south to see some more of NZ.

i should talk a little about The Bowler. it is as close to FB as i'm gonna get for a long time. until i get back to the nasty nac i'd wager. the best thing about work is that at first i was always trying to get my friends to go there for two reasons, one, i have a tab there and i don't have to pay it manually. the second is that i want to improve trade at the bar and make my boss know that i'm helping out. sometime in the last few weeks all my friends at the hostel have decided to make The Bowler their "local" of their own accord. the beer is cheap, the drinks are good and so is the food. and all that happened without me trying any harder than saying "hey, let's hit The Bowler". good for me, good for them, good for everyone. last monday, at karaoke (which i DJ'd) a ton of my friends showed up to make the core of the group and it was sweet. my boss is going to give me more karaoke shifts b/c of that. besides the monday karaoke shift i also have four 9-11:30am cleaning shifts, two bistro lunch shifts, one bistro dinner shifts, and one bar shift. and those are only the scheduled ones. last week i worked those in addition to the karaoke shift, a (by myself!!) lunch bistro and mid day bar shift. last weekend was a classic piss up weekend that hardly stopped except for work. i worked 22 hours in 48 hours and only slept 4. the next night i slept 13. it was sweet. well. honestly, i'm not sure if that math is correct, but you get the drift. it was sweet. that brings me to another plus of the bar. on saturday nights, i work from 10-close; which is 3:00am. after we're done cleaning at 4ish, the bar staff and the band (yeah i party with the band) have what we call "staffies", also known as "lock-ins" until ungodly hours of sunday morning/afternoon. the best part about that used to be the free beer, but now it is the other smaller things. like two weeks ago i made about 10 orders of "chips" for the band/staff and poured them uncounted "jugs" of piss. each time i made up an order of chips i told them that it was the last one and that the frier was off. so much for that.
last weekend. or was that two weekends ago... well anyway, the other weekend i jammed out with the band until the sun came up. let's just say it wasn't pretty. but i really enjoyed pretending to know what i was doing. i think they figured out that i've never held a bass before. but maybe they'll give me a call up this weekend.
none of that would have been possible if i hadn't been down to work every shift offered to me and earn the responsibility to be the jack of all trades that i hope will continue to find me working more and more hours. on monday i worked 11 1/2 hours and was only scheduled for 2 1/2. that is $149.5 instead of $32.5. i also talked to my boss about getting a regular weekly wad of cash instead of the "hey can i get 50 bucks for groceries tomorrow?" kinda shit. they're throwing me enough money to live off of every monday, and i'm banking (read drinking) the rest of my weekly earnings. just kidding, the rest is going into a pot for me to draw out when Josephine comes to visit.

part of that money is going to moving into a flat with some dudes of the Irish and Scottish persuasions. the hard part is finding a place that will comfortably hold four dudes and doesn't want a year long lease. i mean come on. but Allah willing we should find a place for like 70ish bucks a week. that needs to happen soon b/c we are done with this hostel. i could tell horror stories of incompetence, but instead i'll just say that i nothing the owner and i'm moving out as soon as possible for mental happiness reasons.

also, to help you decipher the above, here are some words that i've added to my lexicon:
bro (brew)
flat (apartment/cheap house)
pissed (drunk)
otp/on the piss (had a night out)
pull ("talked" to a girl)
bird (cute girl)
my local (your default bar)
frosty suds (cold beer)
cheeky quiet (a beer on the way home, or a single beer, not a piss up. (see above))
chips (french fries)
jugs (pitchers of beer)




i did NOT get my eyebrows shaved off.

max

max, the contiguous US misses you too.

new blogs galore

three new blogs (yes i too miss CU30S. but nothing that glitters lasts forever...golden...something...).

Anyway! Three new blogs!!!

:

brian's hardcore/movie/comic book loving mind can be found here

his tribute to our group of friends can be found here *

and brian (he loves making blogs!!) started a top 10 blog too

and what would the internet be without more reasons for why i'm awesome?**



* (122 was the address of Upton. Where we all lived. Including Sam.)
**jack shit is what it would be.

ode to david alison

ahhh. This feels good. A little weird. After months of debating I finally have my new laptop. I feel a combination of spoiled and proud. And a little turned on. This mofo is sexy and sleek. 

Pros:

the operating system (OS) is exactly what I thought it would be, and what I wanted

this hardware doesn't mess around

battery life is good, as expected for a new laptop

the built in "i___" programs are more useful and less gimmicky than I thought they would be

the screen is amazing. better than my last laptop (RIP)

the heat and fan noise are bs, compared to the armageddon the forums said they would be

the trackpad (mouse) is amazing. intuitive describes mac, but the trackpad stands out

...more pros to come in the next few days, there are soooo many

Cons

I haven't been able to test the hardware fully (no HL or HL2)

I'm a little concerned that the gaming potential won't match the hardware potential. oh well...

It isn't as easy to "legally" download programs as it is on a PC

I have no idea where files I DL are

I miss having the option to backspace and to delete*(**)

No Page Up or Page Down key. Or Home or End. I use these constantly. (I'm sure there are shortcuts I'll find soon)

Like any Mac newb, I'm using "fn" "control" "option" and "command" in the wrong situations

...more cons soon

I'd really like to thank a blogger out there who helped me make my decision. To really pull the trigger. He went through and is going through the same thing as me. Granted he has a bit more bling bling than yours truly.  David Alison's blog is at davidalison.com. He is much more professional than I am, and he cusses less. I assume b/c of the kids he has. If you have questions about Macs, or making the switch from PC to Mac- please read his blog first and last. If you want to get a feel for the baseline emotions that I went through- please read his blog. If you want to hear about all that with a little bit more cussing and more inarticulate ranting- then read my blog (then his blog).

All jokes aside, I wish that I could write like him, and I think that I'm on my way. This fancy new computer isn't hurting. 

*backspace takes away the character before the text courser and delete takes away the character in front of the courser. you would be surprised how many people don't know that

**apparently, fn + delete is = delete on a PC. so that solves that. kinda. same with fn + up and down for Page Up and Page Down

new blog!

in less important news (see below) i have a new blog!

here is the premise:

comics in under 30 seconds!!!!!!!

here is a blurb from the site:

Yes. You can make humor with under 30 seconds. Just get any medium (pencil, video, mspaint, photoshop, chalk, whatev) and don't start drawing or thinking until you really mean it. You only have 30 seconds!

I'm working on the submission system, but that doesn't mean you can't have your comics already drawn up!

i need you to make a comic. oh you can see the ones i already have here. the first ones begin at the bottom.

please. you gotta send me your comics. just make sure you conceive and draw" them in under 30 seconds, or at least make it close. or lie. whatever. just send me your comics. my email is at the site.

here is a sneak peak at comic #1 by yours truly!


comicsunder30seconds.blogspot.com/

ideas

Since i was at a loss for words yesterday, i've decided to make a list of things to blog about. i'll be able to go back to this list and "manufacture insparado" as the D would say. Not to mention how much you the reader can look forward to future posts!

1. interview another blogger. we each think of 10 questions and then both answer all 20. e-mail me if you are interested.
2. review some of my favorite things. more than just a top 5 list of my favorite comics or whatever, this would be fun for me and anyone lucky enough to read about how much i fucking love Batman.
3. i could do the same thing with links. what are my favorite interweb haunts? that would be a long list, but i'd love to see what other people have to add.
4. write out ideas for my impending trip to europe. that is the whole reason i have this blog. i want to be good at it in two years so that my family and friends can read about me.
5. what grinds my gears. (like road signs in louisiana. wow.)

Typing this i'm reminded of the Simpson's episode where Troy McLure comes out and says that they're doing another 'best of' episode. I really like that episode.

But I'm going to switch gears a bit. There are a lot of things i'm looking forward to. While there are more things that are pissing me off, i think it is important to remember the good stuff. I am upset about ultimate, but i'm also looking forward to the next few months at work. There is lots of stuff to create. I'm also looking forward to starting a savings account for my trip to europe. I'm going to take the money from this job and start putting it away. It should be like 500 bucks. That'll be sweeeeeet. I might feel like an adult for a minute if i do that.

I was in a crap mood this morning b/c i was thinking about haters and how they hate the player as well as the game. Anyway. I started thinking about positive stuff and it didn't help at all. I just got more pissed off. Then i forced- FORCED - myself to quote to Vic a funny joke we had said yesterday. He laughed uproariously and i chuckled. People are still assholes and i pretty much hate most of the world, but i will maybe begrudingly admit that it helped. But not immediately, it took another hour of stewing to forget that i was pissed off. But the joke helped, and i'm glad i can admit that.


Props to Chrissy for some links that really helped with this post.

:eltiT

Another long day of walking and l am beat.

Crap. I don't know what to write. Oh yeah- I did ask Vic who he would take with him when the zombie-ocalypse happens. Vic, Jeff, a doctor, some wise-cracking mechanic we meet along the way, and I are going to fuck some zombies up. Vic knows all about guns and he can even drive and shoot a tank. So that's his list. Mine is a little better, but he is on it for sure. We would be a good team if for some reason we didn't have any bullets, b/c we can both make spearheads and shit like that.

We took some really good pictures today, I'll have to put them up later.
What else can I talk about?
Crap. That question must be the hallmark of a bad blog.
*brainstorm