the xmas effect*

it is 6:05 and i've been awake for an hour.

my dad and were at a dynamo game. then we went to the bar. he got a beer, but i didn't want one. i just wanted to get home. "it" would be there soon. he senses my impatience and downs the beer, pawning the empty bottle off on some newb's table. We go home (to the burned house) and sit in my room (my room from my mom's house). I secretly put the free ipod touch in Josephine's backback. Then I drive out to the FedEx place and it is suddenly 10:30 at night. I convince the person working the night shift to get my package. He/she whatever is a Mac person, so all I had to do was mention what was in it. I get home and gather an excited dad and a reluctant Josephine. Like I do with any package, I open the box with a knife and extreme care and delicacy. There wrapped in the now useless foam is the laptop I've been wanting for... ever? I begin to turn it on and then jerk my hand back- first the power cord! Whew... Dad plugs it in. Then I power it on. I go through the "welcome" screens, entering in my name, the date and such.

Then it goes to shit. Instead of looking at the screen now, the three of us are looking at the closed laptop, with its Dell-like case. Black and grey, with a tag on it that I recognize from the oldest (and shittiest) laptop from work. I turn it over and feel the huge bulk of the ugly, thick piece of crap.
Josephine asks why it looks like a Dell, like a Windows machine.



oh. such. anger.



I immediatly throw open the top and search frantically in the reboot menu. "There must be a way to boot it in Mac's OS X!" After a few trys the creeping aknowledgement stops creeping and starts wailing. I am Noriega and it is Panama. I search Twitter but find no help.

fin.


It is now 6:18. I've been awake for over an hour.
After that dream was over I tried to go back to sleep, but worse than that, it took me a few minutes to realize that it was a dream. Dark depression was only lifted when I realized that I had, slightly, the need to get up and goto the bathroom. "Bathroom?" I thought "I didn't need to goto the bathroom in my dream....... OH! it was a dreeeeaaammm!!!! Sweet...... fuck. Now I have to wait for like 7 fucking hours before it actually comes. And it better not be a fucking Dell."

Sleep was impossible at that point and I vowed to post this little epic before it became only the billionth dream lost to the forgetfullness of the night.



*the xmas effect referrs to when Josephine and I would wake up at 5am on xmas morning. We couldn't wake anyone up but our dad. And only him at like at least 6:30. We would lay there with giggles and butterflies until dad would let us upturn our stockings-quietly- onto the floor, making more and more noise as the minutes passed, so as to eventually wake the house.

indeed

Indeed I have been absent for a very long time. Here is what I've been up to:

converted to Islam*
rode the walrus*
lost a laptop to the devil's scheming ways (i did however win the next fiddle contest i was in. fucking figures...)*
went to the mountain top*
saw the glory of the coming of the lord*
met up with my homies in the city of light*
drove to the end of the sidewalk*
got a new laptop*
posted sweet new comics

new laptop (click for huge):











*some of these things are not exactly true. but exactly to a dewree.**
**Yi-wo quote. only like 5 people will get that. and they have two things in common. they played NWN and they know don't read my blog.